I have been hoping and planning to earn an MBA for the past six years since graduating from college and am excited to now be on the cusp of making that dream a reality. I’ve come a long way from the painfully shy college freshman who initially could hardly even stomach the thought of being a resident advisor because it would involve so much interaction with students I didn’t yet know. I conquered those first fears and went on to become the Resident Hall Council President and Freshman Orientation Leader. My path hasn’t always been easy, but through the challenges and goals I have set for myself I have grown into a confident, thoughtful, and respected leader at my workplace and in my personal life, and I know that these new skills will serve me well as I embark on this next scholastic challenge and the career I see before me post MBA.
I’ve chosen this specific MBA program because of its international focus, group work, and emphasis on learning foreign languages. I see this as perfectly instep with my goal of pursuing a career in management consulting. Over the past few years I have overcome my shyness in the workplace and it is now commonplace for me to lead meetings and advise the CFO of the company I work for on the financial matters that are my sole responsibility and core strength. Continued group work with my fellow students from various backgrounds will serve to cement my new-found confidence in my own abilities and ideas. My interest in international business first sparked during my junior year abroad studying in Germany. This opportunity enabled me to learn written German fluently and, while I am proficient in the spoken language, I am eager to improve my accent, word choice, and confidence level to equal and surpass skills appropriate for daily business usage. Through this experience I was also fully immersed in the German culture and found this to be a very rewarding and educational experience and hope to have the opportunity to travel abroad again either while earning my MBA, or afterwards as a consultant. In this ever broadening global market place, I am aware of what an asset being multi-lingual is, and to that end I plan also to study Arabic, which will improve my marketability.
If admitted to the program, I will bring with me my enthusiasm, dedication, and a stalwart work ethic. I am proud of what I have accomplished thus far in my life and see much of it as a stepping stone toward a successful future in the business world. I now need to expand my skill set beyond its current level and I see the curriculum offered at __________University as the perfect way to do so.
Scholarships are an organization’s financial investment in students. They expect you to do well in school, represent them positively, and give back to your community. But, with so many applicants, how do they choose the winners? Often times, it boils down to the essay portion. Many scholarships have similar essay questions. FastWeb describes some common scholarship essay questions and different approaches for answering them. Here are a few detailed suggestions for some common essay questions.
“Why I need this scholarship?”
The point of this question (and any scholarship essay) is to market yourself and tell the judges why you would be a worthwhile investment. Instead of making a laundry list of activities, describe your achievements specifically and relate them to the essay question. Here are some suggestions:
If you are the first in your family to go to college, you could talk about what it means for you to be the first to go to college, how you have shown determination about going to college, and tie it back to the costs of tuition.
If you immigrated to the United States, you could talk about the fact that you moved to the US for a chance at getting an education at the university level, how you’ve exhibited your desire, and tie it back to the costs of tuition.
If you have overcome adversity in your life (i.e. abuse, disability, financial), you could talk about the obstacles you have overcome, tie the lessons you learned from overcoming adversity into your preparation for college, and how that all ties back to the costs of tuition.
Try brainstorming ideas that convey your story most effectively. This question can be answered by using an experience from the past or by thinking ahead to the future (goals and ambitions). Find a method that you feel paints the strongest picture.
“Who am I?”
This question is very broad and can be answered in many different ways. Again, don’t give them a laundry list of your activities and achievements. Pick a few and write in detail about them. Some suggestions and ideas to write about:
Heritage/Culture
Activities and achievements (leadership and clubs)
Family
Goals and ambitions (current and future)
Obstacles overcome (disability, abuse, etc.)
Make sure to tie your theme back into the scholarship guidelines. You can use words listed in their description to strengthen your claims. Each scholarship is different so tailor your application to the goals and values of the scholarship organization.
“How will this scholarship help you meet your educational and career goals?”
This essay question asks you to talk about your future. Scholarship organizations like to see students with focused goals in their lives. There are several parts to this question:
Describe your plans for college (i.e. anticipated major(s), courses of interest, activities, personal goals)
Emphasize how the scholarship allows you to meet or work towards those goals
Expand your plans beyond college (i.e. type of job, positions)
Include your goals outside of just your career and remember to describe and connect them with how the scholarship helps you meet that goal (i.e. establish an orphanage in East Asia, start a non-profit scholarship organization)
Weave your goals together with a common theme that emphasizes how the scholarship helps you meet your goals
These are just a few common scholarship essay questions. As you are brainstorming and writing, remember to write with a specific theme in mind.
Some scholarships will require personal interviews as part of their selection process. Interviews can be very helpful as it offers you an opportunity to share about yourself face-to-face with a judge or committee. Many people are afraid of interviews and are intimidated by them. However, with plenty of practice and proper instruction, you can learn to ace your interview. Here are some tips to help you prepare for your interview.
RELAX AND BE YOURSELF
Don’t feel pressured going into the interview. Don’t feel like you have to impress the judges or say what you think they want to hear. Think of it this way–they already like you so just be yourself. The interview is nothing more than a conversation between you and judges about yourself and your thoughts. They are scoring you on the way you answer your questions, how well you understand the question, and how well you conduct yourself. If you’re scared or have a few butterflies, it’s completely normal. But remember to relax and just simply talk about yourself and your views. Before long, the nervousness and anxiety will be gone.
KEEP YOUR ANSWER TO THE POINT AND SUCCINCT
When you are asked a question, it should ideally evoke a response from you–whether one of agreement or surprise or excitement. Don’t be afraid to show your emotions and thought process when you’re in the interview. If the question is a little difficult to answer right away, it’s ok to say, “Hmm…that’s a difficult question.” From there you should start to answer the question. Have a big picture idea of how you want to answer the question as you’re speaking. In other words, you should be thinking about your second point while explaining your first point. It’s best to give an example following the old adage, “Show, don’t tell.” Frame the question by stating your core answer. Then elaborate by using an example. Avoid going on long tangents or rambling about an unrelated story.
BE PERSONAL AND ENTHUSIASTIC
You should be confident in your answers so show your enthusiasm. Don’t be overexcited to the point that it seems forced, but you should not look bored. If you can use examples that you’re passionate about, your enthusiasm will come through naturally so have four or five examples ready in your mind so you can use them if necessary. You should engage the judges but don’t embellish. Of course, remember to smile as you’re speaking.
DRESS, LOOK, AND ACT PROFESSIONAL
The dress code should be business attire. It’s always best to dress nicer. It’s easier to go from formal to casual than from casual to formal. Girls should wear skirts, dresses, business suits, etc. While it is fine to wear open-toed shoes to an interview, you may want to be more conservative and wear closed-toe shoes. Guys should wear slacks or dress pants, a dress shirt or collared shirt, a tie if you have one, and in some cases, a blazer or sport coat. Remember to shine your shoes as judges will notice many of these details.
INTERACTION BEFORE, DURING, AND AFTER
Arrive 5-10 minutes prior to your scheduled time. You should not arrive more than 10 minutes early. Be nice, respectful, and courteous to everyone you meet, including receptionists, servers, and secretaries. Be proactive about introducing yourself, greeting people, and shaking hands. During your interview, remember to make and hold eye contact with the judges. When you talk, find something for your hands to do. Don’t click your pen or make any noise, but think about how you can use them to help your interview (i.e. using hand motions/gestures to elaborate a point). After the interview is over, stand and shake hands with each judge and thank them for their participation in the scholarship selection process. Be careful that you don’t sound insincere. You should send them a thank you note after your interview.
PRACTICE, PRACTICE, PRACTICE
Work with your counselor or career advisor on interview questions and your speaking style. Find some sample interview questions and practice answering them. For the few days leading up to the interview, begin thinking about how you might answer the questions and what questions they might ask. Practice your speaking abilities by looking in a mirror or record yourself on a webcam. Work with other people to further develop your own answers.
Review and Revision
This is perhaps one of the most important essays you will ever write, so do not submit your first draft. Read it aloud, have a friend read it, then revise, revise and revise! While a few schools conduct personal interviews, in the vast majority of cases, the personal statement is your only chance to personally connect with the person who holds the decisionmaking power to admit you. Thus, if the essay does not feel right, never hesitate to revise once more. Make sure the essay has the overall content, tone and feel that you intend to convey to the reader.
Do not hesitate to analyze your essay line by line. Question whether each line fits and connects with the others. Ask whether it is concise, effective, and illuminates the general theme or supports an assertion. Make sure that all sentences follow the preceding ones in logical order. If something is not absolutely clear to you, it certainly will not be clear to the reader who knows nothing about you.
Eliminate all redundancies
Read over each paragraph and make sure that each is dedicated to a separate thesis or theme. Repeating the same topic or theme over and over again will bore the reader, and the essay will lack the professional feel that you are trying to convey.
Look at the essay as a whole
Are there any missing parts which would aid your thesis? If so, go over your "paired" list (pairings of facts and personal attributes) and provide the material for the missing sections.
Support all assertion
Find any claims or assertions that are unsupported by facts, events, or other descriptive material. Compare "I am an enterprising individual" with "While going to college and taking a full engineering course load, a couple of friends and I decided to form our own software company ..." If these gaps exist, use facts to link your particular experiences with the message you are sending. Every line should make logical sense, every fact must support and support your thesis.
Proofreading
The Final step of your writing process should be to have two or more people read your essay. One person should be someone very familiar with your personal background. If pertinent information is excluded in your essay, that person will be able to point it out. The second person should be someone who is casually acquainted with you. Since any areas in your essay which are unclear to this reader will also likely be unclear to the Admissions Committee, this reader should be able to point out the problems. Lastly, but very importantly, a third person should check for grammatical and spelling errors. You must make sure that there are absolutely no errors in your essay. After all, you are trying to convey a professional image of yourself. You'd be surprised how bad an impression a single spelling error makes on the reader. Reread, reread, and reread again!
I hopes that you employ the above winning strategy and systematic writing process to your full advantage to produce the highest quality personal statement possible. Once you are ready to trust your personal statement with professionals, we will be here. Good Luck!
I consider myself extremely fortunate to be here in the United States earning my education because I know how easy it would have been for this never to take place. Moving here all by myself from Shanghai to attend college was the most difficult thing I have ever done. I had never been away from my family before, I hadn’t even traveled outside of China prior to this trip, and I knew I was in for a big change. At home I was known as a very social young woman; I was regularly elected to be the president of clubs, and I was an active sports participant, but once I got to the US, I was so nervous about using my English, and so afraid that I would do or say something out of place in this unknown culture, that I became rather reclusive. I knew what I was doing was foolish: I was here to make new friends and learn about American culture as well as to study, so I forced myself to start socializing more. Fortunately my roommate was very helpful in making me feel more comfortable speaking English, and with her guidance and encouragement I started to branch out. I am still working on improving my English, but I now see it as a “work in progress” rather than something to be embarrassed about if I make a mistake. Now, when I hear words I don’t know, I write them down to look up later and make myself use them in sentences when I get home so that everyday I feel myself becoming more confident. I have even found part-time work as a Sunday school teacher. In addition to the fulfillment I get from helping children learn, I find that it is very easy for me to work on my own language skills with them since I am very comfortable in their presence and they like to feel that they are teaching me something too.
It has been a remarkable experience thus far and I can say that I have made some good new friends, and hope to make more before my studies are through, but perhaps the best part has been my new confidence in my abilities to succeed in this culture as well as my own. My grades have been excellent, and are evidence of my commitment to academics. I am now seeking a Master’s degree in business because of my strong desire to go back to Shanghai armed with the necessary knowledge to grow my family’s business. When I was growing up my parents were very poor and both worked in low paying positions, but they had a strong work ethic and an enterprising spirit which led them to start their own business. Through the years it has become profitable and I now hope that upon my return I will be able to move the company to the next level. China’s future is bright and I hope to add to that luster with my hard won education. I know I won’t be ready for that challenge without this next crucial achievement and if I am admitted to the program at ____University I will work diligently to prove my abilities. I will also be able to offer a unique perspective to the class with my knowledge of Asian business practices.
Keep your goals in mind
Telling your personal story, like any storytelling, can take many forms. From short and choppy to verbose and ornate. Introducing one's self in a personal statement can take many forms and shapes--as varied as individuals themselves speak. However, a successful personal statement is a narrow form of introduction which narrowly focuses on the question posed by the application form by answering two central questions--"Who am I?" and "What Can I offer?" The successful personal statement never strays from these twin objectives--introducing yourself and describing your potential as a successful candidate. Hence, it is important to isolate key accomplishments, turning points, and events in one's life which shed light on these central themes. Analyze your resume, personal history and memory to isolate certain key "defining moments" in your life.
Personal Assessment
The personal statement writing process can be an exciting process because it presents the opportunity to tell and explore your own personal history. What we write down, what we focus on, what we highlight and explore gives an insight as to our own particular and unique values, hopes, aspirations and ideals. Keep this in mind. The information you present, as much as how you present it, can portray you either as a positive and eager individual or as an easily discouraged person merely going through the motions of the application process. Always keep in mind the particular image you wish to portray when sifting through your personal facts and writing your essay.
Some of the topics to explore and develop for essay purposes include:
hobbies
projects you have completed
particular jobs and responsibilities
accomplishments -- both professional and scholastic
major life events that you believe have changed you
challenges and personal hurdles you have overcome
life events which motivate you to apply for this particular course of education.
individuals who influenced, prepared, or motivated you to pursue a particular profession or school
particular traits, work habits, attitudes or sensibilities that you have developed which will insure your success in school or in a profession.
your goals
Always remember to explore these topics with the underlying purpose of showing how these events, experiences and people have affected you in such a way that will help you succeed in the school you are applying to. Keep in mind, as you create your list, that you wish to give the reader the impression that you have the motivation, direction, and drive to succeed in their school or program. At this stage, focus on writing down, as specifically as possible, the different events and accomplishments that you feel should be mentioned. You need not be concerned with grammar or other technicalities this early on. The important point is that you adequately describe your chosen events and accomplishments.
Organizing Facts
Now that you have listed your interests and past jobs, read these facts carefully and isolate the emotion that each fact/event triggers. Does the memory of an event or activity or accomplishment trigger pride? Resolution? A sense of "making peace and moving on"? Does it motivate you to forge ahead and do more to correct a mistake? Once you are emotionally engaged, try to identify one trait that make yous feel good or particularly proud of AND isolate the personal trait that you feel was improved or took some time to improve. Then isolate the events, experiences, or people with personal traits, goals and motivation. Circle the facts and pair them with specific personal traits or personal qualities. You should then write short sentences explaining how each pairing would help you become successful in the particular school or program you are applying to. Now you are now ready to find an organizing structure or format for your essay.
AdmissionsEssays.Com's BioGraph(sm) questionnaire automates the three steps above to let our writers gain a quick and comprehensive view into an applicant's personal attributes, potential, and values in order to highlight their personal achievements and potential for excellence. This is then used by our writers to craft the most effective sample personal statement possible. You can then use this statement as an inspiration for organizing your final statement.
Choosing a Format
Just as stories could be told in various forms, ranging from the novel to a short story to parables and allegories, one's personal story can fit into many types of presentations. Nevertheless, certain formats predominate over others because these formats are more commonly used. Below are just three popular organizing and thematic formats AdmissionsEssays.Com uses in developing custom personal statements.
Overcoming Adversity This format emphasizes one's tenacity, patience, and diligence in dealing with, overcoming, or making peace with unpleasant life-transforming events or characters. Far from placing blame or making excuses, this format isolates the applicant's ability to thrive despite external and/or internal hindrances.
DO's:
Be Descriptive. Use facts to back up ALL your assertions. Never state specifics--describe them. How exactly are you "more mature"? What experiences have you had that would warrant an attribution of "entrepreneurial" and "creative"? Although most Admissions Committees are not looking for statements that describe some sort of personal revelation or enlightenment, use your personal facts to describe who you are and why you are exceptional.
Emphasize your positive attitude by stating your future plans. Fit this material with certain facts or programs about the school that you have researched.
Show a proactive attitude through your word choices and sentence sequence.
DONT'S:
Do not dwell on how you suffered or how much of a "victim" you were.
Don't place blame or judge--you don't want to come off as bitter and angry.
Don't engage in self-pity.
Personal Growth This format surveys the achievements and accomplishments of the applicant and comments upon these events. The comments trace the evolution and transformation of the individual into a successful and determined candidate.
DO's:
Use a positive, active voice
Focus on the changes in your attitude and perspective giving concrete factual examples of these changes.
Give a clear, concise and adequately developed description of key events from which you derived personal growth and wisdom.
DONT's:
Make excuses for failed and dashed expectations.
Explain why things did not work out and most importantly what you have done to cope with disappointments. However, outside of illness or other unforeseen circumstances, don't explain away bad grades or bad semesters. If applicable, do explain how personal setbacks have given you a new attitude which translated into a concrete accomplishment.
Try not to overfocus on personal enlightenment but focus instead on concrete outcomes or consequences of such personal revelations.
Appear to feel sorry for yourself.
Focus on just ONE achievement.
Appear angry or bitter.
Family History This format tells a family member's story and how the applicant interacted with that person's legacy or was inspired by that person's achievements. This format is often used to show how historical influences color and shape an individual.
DO's:
Isolate personal traits and attributes
Briefly describe a family member who has inspired you to pursue your education or particular professional vocation.
You may discuss, briefly, any struggles that your family has overcome.
DONT's:
Overstate family problems.
Appear to be asking for pity.
Place so much importance on your family's struggle that you lose focus on your own struggles and achievements. Remember that the Family History format's purpose is to highlight YOUR achievements & YOUR ability to cope with family obstacles.
Here is a sample of a letter containing scholarship request.
-------------
Date
(Scholarship) Coordinator
Institute Sains and Technology
342 E Streets, NE
California, 20006
Dear Scholarship Coordinator:
I recently learned of the (scholarship/internship/fellowship) offered by your organization. I believe I would make an ideal candidate. Please send me an application and any other information pertaining to the (scholarship). I have enclosed a self-addressed stamped envelope for your convenience. Thank you for your assistance. I look forward to receiving the requested paperwork.
